Category Archives: People

You Can not Give what You Do not Have

You can’t love another human being unless you love and accept yourself. You cannot give what you don’t have. Your self-worth is very important. I am not referring to glorious vanity or your thinking more highly of yourself that you ought. I am referring to the mentality of accepting yourself wholly and without prejudice. It is a treasure and a delight when I meet someone who knows their own worth. When you are aware of who you really are (not who others think you are), you refuse to accept anything less than what you are worth. When I talk about ‘worth’ here, I am referring to your value. Surely, you are priceless.

There is no amount of money that can equal to your existence. There is no amount of money that can be paid to cover your presence. But value, in this case, has to do with how you feel about yourself, treat yourself and what thoughts you think towards yourself.

When you value yourself, others will follow suit in like manner. Many people stay in relationships that are unhealthy because they believe that their own worth is tied to another person. Believe me when I say that your worth is not engulfed within another person. If you are in this type of relationship, Get Out Now! And decide that you are worth it. You deserve to be in a healthy, loving relationship. Other people can help, teach, encourage and empower us but no one can place a measure of value upon you except you-alone. You must know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you are worthy! Say it with me: “I am Worthy of Love”

Though the world can be an unloving place, we all, in spite of what we show forth to others, we all have the capacity to love. Love is universal. Any person can recognize love with their heart. It may take longer for some people to recognize love because hurt has blocked them but given the chance, they will. Some people need more love and therefore, more patience to deal with. When you meet someone who seems the most unloving – they are the ones who really need it. They need something to penetrate the wall of hurt. The only power that can penetrate is a power called love, often nothing else. So, I urge you to be an action figure, a shero or hero, called Love!


Frenetta Tate is CEO of Frenetta Tate International, a Certified Women’s Life Empowerment Coach, Certified International Entrepreneur Coach, Business Strategist, Author and Speaker. I am passionate about helping men and women understand their unique advantage, embrace their personal power with clarity and navigate through life using effective strategies for their unique success. Feel free to email to frenetta@frenettatate.com or connect to @frenettatate on social media.

Don’t say anything at all

Strongly consider the effects of your speaking death or misfortune over someone else’s life. We are all connected. When you do it to others, you are doing it to yourself. I wonder if the tables were turned and it was done to you, in your face, repeatedly, day after day. I don’t think you would like it at all. Consider the other person is just as human as you are, flaws, faults, frailties and mistakes. If you knew the power of your words (whether in jest or not), you would be far more careful about what you say about yourself and others. Consider your words carefully before you speak them, over your own life and anyone else’s. Think. It is not cool or dope to do it. Choose not to encourage or engage it in conversations with others. You will feel better having restrained yourself. I encourage you to adopt this very simple task: if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. Speak positively about yourself and others. If you don’t want it to come true for you, don’t say it.

Frenetta Tate is CEO of Frenetta Tate International, a Certified Women’s Life Empowerment Coach, Certified International Entrepreneur Coach, Business Strategist, Author and Speaker. I am passionate about helping Entrepreneurs understand their unique advantage, embrace their personal power with clarity and develop a unique business strategy for their business growth and sustainability. email to frenetta@frenettatate.com or connect to @frenettatate on social media.

 

Don’t solely rely on other people

It is not a good idea to solely make your determinations, judgments, decisions and resolves based on opinions. I encourage you to get clarity: learn for yourself, read for yourself and get an understanding so you can be clear to make educated choices about people, places and things. If it is at all possible for you, base your decisions on knowledge that you have attained through your own search for understanding. People’s opinions are their viewpoints, not taking your thoughts and beliefs into account, and they have a right to it.

Viewpoints are shaped by experiences, upbringing, perceptions and a person’s own truth that they use to guide their own lives, which may not resonate or connect with the way you live and what you believe. So, don’t solely rely on other people for your news and information, especially when you can find out for yourself.

Frenetta Tate is CEO of Frenetta Tate International, a Certified Women’s Life Empowerment Coach, Certified International Entrepreneur Coach, Business Strategist, Author and Speaker. I am passionate about helping Entrepreneurs understand their unique advantage, embrace their personal power with clarity and develop a unique business strategy for their business growth and sustainability. email to frenetta@frenettatate.com or connect to @frenettatate on social media.

It Will not End Until…

 

It will not end until accountability, responsibility and true justice is taken seriously across the board – top down and then across. The pattern is that a vast majority of police officers are not held accountable for killing unarmed men and women who are clearly no threat to them or to society. They are not doing their jobs. They are being paid to be criminals. I don’t care how they were trained and I am tired of them hiding behind ‘training’ and not being charged with activities that are criminal. I am tired of them being ‘above the law.’

We are smart. We see. We rightly judge. We look at the videos and discuss it among ourselves. There is no open season on blacks. We are not going to put these images and phrases out there. That is not what we want or desire. We do not want an ‘open season’, We do not want to be ‘targeted’, we do not want to be in ‘fear’ of our lives just driving down the street or standing still. We do not want that. What we want is to be able to live and enjoy life and not continue to be threatened, harassed, beaten and killed because of who we are.

We are tired of being misjudged, mishandled, misunderstood, falsely accused and guilty before innocent. What we ask for, continually, is to simply live our lives, enjoy peace and happiness, afforded to all in this damn country. I am sick of the racial divides that promote hate and the people who continue to propagate it throughout this country. I am tired of people talk big talk and doing nothing about it – putting up a good front for the TV and behind the scenes not doing anything to solve the problems.

It starts with accountability and responsibility for criminal action, then conviction, then sentencing that fits the crime and a pattern of such.

  • When police officers see that they will no longer be able to just shoot and kill someone without a justifiable reason – they will start actually doing their jobs the way it is supposed to be done.
  • When police officers see that there is no longer a network of people supporting their criminal behavior, they will have no choice but to do their jobs correctly.
  • We need an increase in examples of conviction, prosecution and proper sentencing of police officers who abuse their power and kill unjustifiably.  I further believe that police officers who have gotten away with unjustifiable murders should have their cases reopened and reviewed by a higher, objective court, with subsequent proper sentencing.
  • No longer should a police officer be set free when his or her actions are criminal. At that point, he or she should not be considered an officer, but a civilian, because the actions were not congruent with that of an officer. They were not protecting and serving; they were acting outside of the bounds of their duties and therefore, it is something else.
  • There needs to be a stricter adherence to the law for police officers, judges, police chiefs, district attorneys, mayors and internal affairs staffers.

I hope there is a DA and a Judge that will have the courage to step outside of the ‘code’ or the unwritten ‘I got your back’ laws and do what is right, instead of what is easy.

I have a theory and I am speaking into the universe that things will begin to unravel in various areas of government, public and private, about why police officers are not being held accountable for unjustified shootings.

  • May it be revealed the truth about side deals, bribes, gift exchanges, favor exchanges and other unlawful acts.  
  • May whispered conversations that are against policy or that show a blatant miscarriage of justice be heard loudly.
  • May lawmakers, influential person(s) or anyone who can effect radical change in how this is all done rise up with the courage to walk away from the ‘in’ crowd and reveal the currently hidden information about why things are happening the way they are.
  • May the ‘behind the scenes’ become the front page news.’ 
  • May everyone who has anything to do with these cover-ups and mishandled justifications be ousted through a divine intervention.
  • May resignations of people who are fouling up the system come forth.
  • May those who truly want to make a difference in our justice system rise in power and truth and NEVER BACK DOWN, speak truth to power and render right judgments.

Now, that I have gotten that out of the way. Here is where WE come in.

It will not end until WE do what we need to do in our own communities. WE have work to do. WE cannot ‘wait’ for things to be given to us. WE must do the work within our own communities. WE must unify and strengthen ourselves; Mind, Body and Spirit. Instead of asking “What is the plan?” Ask “what can I do?” and then be willing and ready to do it. Start right where you stand. Start with yourself and let it permeate. Start with feeding your mind, taking care of your body and coming to a right spirit within. It is time for us to become more united than we are divided. We can’t effect change with a divided house. It is only through ‪‎unification‬, can change manifest. We need to get ourselves together. Each state and each city can mobilize their communities, bring everyone together to educate and empower them. This is not about violence, eye for an eye or revenge. As you know, you live by the sword, you die by the sword. We are not desiring to die! No one has to die! We want to live and we fight for this through unification, education and empowerment of our people. WE put forth the effort to change the landscape of our lives and our communities, one person at a time. I’ve developed the EECBU 7 step solution.

The EECBU 7 Step Solution

Educate Our People. Empower Our Communities. Build Unity.

  • In your community, Form a leadership team of passionate and sound-thinking individuals.
  • Meet to discuss an agenda for the community wide meeting
  • Create a flyer to hand out to everyone in neighborhood to invite them. Do it!
  • Have a community-wide meeting at a local community center in your neighborhood.

Have the following or similar discussion topics:

  • The Current Problems
    • Community Perceptions
    • Community Appearance
    • Loss of Unification
    • Loss of Life
    • Dealing with the Police
  • The Sustainable Solutions
    • Change the perception and appearances
    • Mini Communication Courses
    • Develop a team of Community Caretakers
    • Policing our own neighborhood
  • Community Cleanup Days
    • Get volunteer street leaders for each street
    • Solicit Donations for trash bags and other needs
    • Yard beautification guidelines – Start with your yard to clean up the community!
  • Community Patrol Officers
    • To police our own neighborhood – Get them trained in ER, FR and FA, develop patrol schedules, daily logs and incident reports.
  • Community Conversations
    • Stay connected by building regular block parties for quick 30 minute classes on various topics related to Life-Skills, Discussion panels and motivational speakers.
  • Have 5 sign-up sheets for the above areas – Names, Numbers and Emails of people WILLING and READY TO ACT and serve in these capacities, as well as designate leaders.
  • Create Accountability teams for all of the above discussion topics

The key is to take back the neighborhood, educate the people, and empower them with knowledge and skills. Build relationships and promote unity among our people. If you follow the above, you will see transformation in your neighborhood.

It is important to be a part of the solution instead of continuing to talk about the problem.

This is one solution, starting from the inside out. There may be other solutions. I believe it begins in OUR HOUSE! We’ve got to change perception, encourage new ideas and thought, as well as get our minds right, ourselves in order and bring back the unity in our community.

 

Learn more about Frenetta at http://www.frenettatate.com

Say Hello to Your Good

I have been through a lot in my 40+ years of age. I have experienced a lot of pain, a lot of anguish, a lot of lies, a lot of distrustful women/men, a lot of wasted time, a lot of wasted tears, a lot of wasted money, etc. Shall I go on? I have been able to glean from it all. Sometimes we can allow the bad things that happen to us get us down, make us to feel depressed, hopeless, sad and defeated and sometimes people say bad things to break us, do us wrong, take advantage of us, crush us and cause us to feel less than or not good enough by saying, “I DON’T WANT YOU!”.  The truth is WE ARE GOOD ENOUGH!

I have something to say to ALL the BAD STUFF and the infamous I DON’T WANT YOUs and YOU can declare this for your life, as well:

I DECLARE to all of the BAD THINGS and all of the I DON’T WANT YOUs that have been told to me in an attempt to bring me down and has not added progression to my life, I would like to proudly say that, “I don’t want you, either, I don’t need you, either!”. You have been no good to my life; nothing but experiences to try and destroy the life I am building. YOU will not succeed over me! I am a child of GOD, I am covered in his blood, I am protected and I will always succeed! I will never be defeated, not even by those repeated and demeaning words in my head that you said just to try and hold me back because I have learned the lesson from this even in YOUR attempt to defeat me and crush me. I WILL NOT LOSE! 

So, instead of allowing those words to continuously be thrown at me in my lifetime, I now say BACK to you, “I DON’T WANT YOU” in my life. THOSE WORDS CAN GO! Get out of my life. I have had it with you coming around, taking up space and leaving me empty. I have had it with you complaining and whining about the misery of life. I am sick of you whispering in my ear that situations are hopeless. I will not let you pull me down anymore. All the bad, inconsequential, nonsense, ridiculousness, outrageous, mean, uncaring, thoughtless and meaningless things are NOW no longer relevant to me. YOU no longer have POWER over me, NOT your WORDS or ACTIONS.

 To ALL the BAD STUFF, I have RISEN from the ashes of the pain that you have caused me in my life and I say, unequivocally and without a doubt that I DON’T WANT YOUR BAD KIND, ANYMORE! You have to go, GET OUT OF MY LIFE. I will not let you continue to bring me down and cause me to feel like I am less than and not good enough. I don’t need the negative energy YOU BRING to my life. YOU are always trying to DRAIN my life from living the very best. I DON’T NEED YOU ANYMORE!  I don’t need the SORRY and the BLAME that your BAD STUFF bring when you come around. I don’t want you to come around anymore!   Leave me alone, don’t come knocking on my door, do not bother me, don’t call me, don’t text me, don’t come see me.  To ALL the BAD STUFF, You tried your best to tear me down, to break me down, to crush my spirit, to stump on my heart, to knock me down a peg, to take away my joy and to steal my peace. YOU TRIED and you HAVE FAILED. I WILL NOT LOSE, I WILL NOT BE DEFEATED!  YOU HAVE NOT WON!  I HAVE WON!  I am STILL STANDING! I am standing tall, strong, bold and confident and that I WILL REMAIN!

YOU are NOT WELCOME here!  I DON’T WANT TO SEE YOU ANYMORE!  GOODBYE BAD STUFF and the infamous I DON’T WANT YOUs!

I NOW open my arms to RECEIVE ALL of the GOOD that has been waiting on me, ALL the good that stood at the door and knocked but I would not let them in because the BAD was there. I open my arms wide to receive the beautiful gifts of LOVE, KINDNESS, FAITHFULNESS, PATIENCE, THOUGHTFULNESS and JOY.

I walk into the beauty of my life without the BAD and I say, without hesitation, HELLO GOOD and WELCOME TO MY LIFE!

Share Your Story:  Have you said goodbye to the bad and welcomed the good?

Frenetta Tate is a Motivational Orator, International Author, Women’s Empowerment Coach, Business Consultant and Partner. Learn more at http://www.frenettatate.com