Category Archives: Success

Say Hello to Your Good

I have been through a lot in my 40+ years of age. I have experienced a lot of pain, a lot of anguish, a lot of lies, a lot of distrustful women/men, a lot of wasted time, a lot of wasted tears, a lot of wasted money, etc. Shall I go on? I have been able to glean from it all. Sometimes we can allow the bad things that happen to us get us down, make us to feel depressed, hopeless, sad and defeated and sometimes people say bad things to break us, do us wrong, take advantage of us, crush us and cause us to feel less than or not good enough by saying, “I DON’T WANT YOU!”.  The truth is WE ARE GOOD ENOUGH!

I have something to say to ALL the BAD STUFF and the infamous I DON’T WANT YOUs and YOU can declare this for your life, as well:

I DECLARE to all of the BAD THINGS and all of the I DON’T WANT YOUs that have been told to me in an attempt to bring me down and has not added progression to my life, I would like to proudly say that, “I don’t want you, either, I don’t need you, either!”. You have been no good to my life; nothing but experiences to try and destroy the life I am building. YOU will not succeed over me! I am a child of GOD, I am covered in his blood, I am protected and I will always succeed! I will never be defeated, not even by those repeated and demeaning words in my head that you said just to try and hold me back because I have learned the lesson from this even in YOUR attempt to defeat me and crush me. I WILL NOT LOSE! 

So, instead of allowing those words to continuously be thrown at me in my lifetime, I now say BACK to you, “I DON’T WANT YOU” in my life. THOSE WORDS CAN GO! Get out of my life. I have had it with you coming around, taking up space and leaving me empty. I have had it with you complaining and whining about the misery of life. I am sick of you whispering in my ear that situations are hopeless. I will not let you pull me down anymore. All the bad, inconsequential, nonsense, ridiculousness, outrageous, mean, uncaring, thoughtless and meaningless things are NOW no longer relevant to me. YOU no longer have POWER over me, NOT your WORDS or ACTIONS.

 To ALL the BAD STUFF, I have RISEN from the ashes of the pain that you have caused me in my life and I say, unequivocally and without a doubt that I DON’T WANT YOUR BAD KIND, ANYMORE! You have to go, GET OUT OF MY LIFE. I will not let you continue to bring me down and cause me to feel like I am less than and not good enough. I don’t need the negative energy YOU BRING to my life. YOU are always trying to DRAIN my life from living the very best. I DON’T NEED YOU ANYMORE!  I don’t need the SORRY and the BLAME that your BAD STUFF bring when you come around. I don’t want you to come around anymore!   Leave me alone, don’t come knocking on my door, do not bother me, don’t call me, don’t text me, don’t come see me.  To ALL the BAD STUFF, You tried your best to tear me down, to break me down, to crush my spirit, to stump on my heart, to knock me down a peg, to take away my joy and to steal my peace. YOU TRIED and you HAVE FAILED. I WILL NOT LOSE, I WILL NOT BE DEFEATED!  YOU HAVE NOT WON!  I HAVE WON!  I am STILL STANDING! I am standing tall, strong, bold and confident and that I WILL REMAIN!

YOU are NOT WELCOME here!  I DON’T WANT TO SEE YOU ANYMORE!  GOODBYE BAD STUFF and the infamous I DON’T WANT YOUs!

I NOW open my arms to RECEIVE ALL of the GOOD that has been waiting on me, ALL the good that stood at the door and knocked but I would not let them in because the BAD was there. I open my arms wide to receive the beautiful gifts of LOVE, KINDNESS, FAITHFULNESS, PATIENCE, THOUGHTFULNESS and JOY.

I walk into the beauty of my life without the BAD and I say, without hesitation, HELLO GOOD and WELCOME TO MY LIFE!

Share Your Story:  Have you said goodbye to the bad and welcomed the good?

Frenetta Tate is a Motivational Orator, International Author, Women’s Empowerment Coach, Business Consultant and Partner. Learn more at http://www.frenettatate.com

Let Go to Grow

Just as a leaf that falls off a tree and a new one grows in its place; you have to let go to grow and then let go again to grow some more. Keep growing. As you grow, those old things fall off because you have gotten too big for them.

If you have been on a self-discovery journey or have committed yourself to self improvement; there at least five things that occur in a natural progression;

1. The people you associate with changes

2. The people who want to associate with you changes

3. The people you attract changes

4. YOU change the way you show up in your relationships

5. People respond differently because you are different.

No matter what happens on your journey; there are two things that you need to know:

1. Those who are supposed to be with you; will be with you.

2. Those who are not, will not be with you.

So, don’t beg anyone to stay in your life who wants to leave. Let them walk away. If they are supposed to be a part of your journey, at any juncture along the way, they will be there. The ones that leave are not bad – they just have their own journey and we have to let it be okay that they feel the unction to move on. We do well to respect each others’ journey and never beg or plead for anyone to stay in our lives who do not want to be in our lives. We are worthy and valued. We bring a unique flavor like no one else. Stick with those who like your flavor! Let go of those who don’t. As we grow and mature, no matter our age, these things become easier to accept but we have to let go so we can grow and release others so that they can grow, too.

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Frenetta Tate is an International Best-Selling Author, Certified Empowerment Coach, Motivational Speaker, Event Strategy Consultant and President of EmpowerMe365™. Learn more at http://www.frenettatate.com

Don’t Get Caught Up

Many of us can get too caught up in the things of the world that we completely lose ourselves in it, making decisions based on what other people think about us, go along with and adopt ways of being that do not line up with the values we truly hold dear –all for the sake of pleasing others. No, be authentically you, not an imitation of societal fantasies. Don’t change yourself to fit in nor give in to pressures of others to do something that doesn’t give YOU peace. Stand up for yourself. #EmpowerMyLifeFrenetta

Frenetta Tate is an International Best Selling Author of “Hot Mama in High Heels”, Certified Empowerment Coach and Motivational Speaker. Visit www.frenettatate.com to learn more about her services and products.

Twenty Dynamic Declarations

A DECLARATION is an explicit statement or announcement. When you declare something, you are speaking it into the atmosphere; into the universe. When you EXPLICITLY DECLARE something, you are leaving no room for any confusion whatsoever. You are saying it and saying it loud, bold and with authority. There is NO wavering of what you are speaking. You mean what you SAY and you say what you MEAN!  I DARE you to DECLARE your life TODAY and BEYOND and let NO ONE be confused about what you EXPECT in your life!

  1. Declare: Everywhere I step is blessed ground. I’m winning!
  2. Declare: No matter what I face today – God has my back, front and both sides.
  3. Declare: I walk this day out with my head up, my shoulders straight, a smile on my face and a beat in my step.
  4. Declare: I am Focused, Determined, Immovable, Steadfast, Encouraged and Empowered.
  5. Declare: I am Valuable, Exceptional, Loving, Caring, Compassionate and Strong.
  6. Declare: I am Intelligent, Confident, Capable, Talented, Wise and Worthy.
  7. Declare: I will not let a negative label define me. I will not let anyone define me. I define myself.
  8. Declare: I’ve got much to do and fear has been holding me back long enough.
  9. Declare: I have resolved to face my fears today.
  10. Declare: I’m winning. Can’t nothing stop me now!
  11. Declare: I am the thermostat; I set the temperature. I am love walking, I am faith talking and I will not be shaken.
  12. Declare: When I enter the room, the atmosphere changes, gossip ceases, tension releases and peace abides.
  13. Declare: If I don’t have anything nice or uplifting to say, I will keep my mouth shut.
  14. Declare: I will not make bad assumptions about situations.
  15. Declare: I will not verbally speculate in the negative direction.
  16. Declare: I will not speak anything negative over myself or anyone else.
  17. Declare: I will speak only that which I want to happen in my life.
  18. Declare: I am expecting a move of favor in my direction.
  19. Declare: I am more than enough!
  20. Declare: I overcome every obstacle.

Share Your Story:  What declarations have I missed? Feel free to add them in the comment section below.

Frenetta Tate, President of EmpowerMe365 is a Certified Empowerment Coach and Motivational Speaker. She can be reached at http://www.frenettatate.com.

Ten Honest Career Tips

I’ve had the opportunity to train and coach people seeking employment over the past several years and I have found the following ten career tips are the most helpful to them in their search so I want to share them with you. Please forward this post to ANYONE looking for employment that you think may benefit from these tips.

  1. Do a “Cleave”  or “Chest” check. The quickest way a woman can lose credibility is to have her breast exposed too much. Men will like it but you run the risk of appearing like you are “trying too hard”. Make sure you are appropriately covered. Men will do well to keep their shirt buttoned up or wear a tie. If the dress code is business casual, stay more toward the business side of business casual and you won’t go wrong.
  2. Dress the Part. If you are diligently looking for employment; you are always “on”, which means that at any moment, you could be called for an interview, you could be interviewed on the spot or you could meet a potential employer as you are out and about. Always be ready to present yourself professionally.
  3. Be kind to the Gatekeeper. The receptionist is there for a reason. Be kind to him or her. They are there to direct callers and qualify appointments, as well as other duties. You are not an exception. Don’t take their response personally unless he or she is blatantly rude. Even in that case, maintain your professionalism and your kindness. They will remember that about you and you will have set yourself apart.
  4. Follow Instructions. This is VERY IMPORTANT! If you are responding to an ad; be sure to follow all instructions to the letter. If the ad says ‘no calls’; do not look up the company and call them nor go to visit them if the ad did not tell you to do so. Your ability to follow instructions is crucial. A potential employer is observing whether you can follow their instructions. If you are unsure, either do not apply or use your best judgment if there is no contact information provided. It is best to err on the side of caution.
  5. Boast Not. It is great to feel a sense of pride and accomplishment because of your achievements. Allow that feeling to fuel your right confidence about your abilities in a professional way. Boasting about how good you are at your work remains to be seen and experienced in the eyes of the potential employer. Do exude confidence but refrain from an outward arrogance.
  6. Ask for the job. If you believe that you are a great organizational fit for the company, let the company know your intent and ask to be strongly considered for the job. If given the opportunity, go a step further and share why you believe you are the right candidate.
  7. Say Thank you. Whether you’ve nailed the job or not; send a thank you note to the person(s) with whom you have interviewed. Grab a business card from the front desk or ask for one so you will have the address. Send it the same day, if possible.
  8. Remain Positive and Upbeat. Let every interview stand on its own, as well as every company with which you interview. It is unprofessional to discuss other companies in a poor manner. If the companies are rivals; do not engage in any bad-mouthing of the other rival company, no matter what the Interviewer shares. Remember that you do not yet have the job so be on your Ps and Qs. Show excitement and interest about the job. Show that you really want it through your tone and body language.
  9. Right hand, Left hand. It is unwise to include your potential employer in your decision-making process, talking to them about any issues you are having, what the other companies are offering or what you are basing all of your decisions on. That is too much information, especially when they have not offered you the job. In this case, the right hand does not need to know what the left hand is doing until an official offer given. Even at that point, keep it at a minimum.
  10. Answer what is asked. Expounding on answers are best when they are kept to a minimum. It is easy to go on and on about a scenario but put some limits in place. Answer the question fully as best you can. If you are unsure, you can ask, “Did that answer your question or would you like me to expound further?”

Above all, remain professional in all your interviews and correspondence with potential employers; no matter what occurs. The world becomes small when you are seeking employment so it pays to be kind and use some simple guiding principles to help you stay at the top of your game; standing above your competitors.

Share Your Story:  What are some other tips not listed here? Can you attest to any of the tips above?

Frenetta Tate, President of EmpowerMe365, is a Certified Empowerment Coach and Motivational Speaker. She can be reached at www.frenettatate.com.